TOOL OF THE DAY: What’s the Biggest Farce in Divorce?

CATEGORY: Family Law State Interest

Excerpt from book: "NOT in the Child's Best Interest" p. 191

The biggest Farce in Divorce is that the state has a valid interest in protection of your child between two disputing fit parents. The state has NO valid state interest to protect your child from fit parents. The lie the family courts tell is based upon 19thCentury beliefs about the nature of families and the way the that the constitution protects families. Those beliefs were declared to be unconstitutional by the United States Supreme Court when it overturned the Bastardy Codes in the mid 1970's.

The constitution demands that parents rights be protected as "individual" rights that do NOT turn on whether or not a parent is married to the other parent. The constitution demands that children NOT be punished for the marital choices of their parents over which they have no control. The constitution demands that parents be presumed to be fit until the state proves otherwise following constitutionally sufficient Notice of unfitness charges and a proper deprivation hearing where the parent is provided opportunity to challenge the state's authority under constitutioally adequate Confrontation and Cross-Examination.

The state cannot just pretend that your rights have dissapeared or to condition your access to the child custody court upon your waiver of your constitutional rights. You have a fundamental right to access state courts to protect or vindicate your federal rights and the state holds the burden of prooving it can justify depriving you of those rights. This need that divorce courts have to dictate to divorced parents how they can parent their children is an unconstitutional sickness or an evil against the constitution that offends the constituion. It's past time that we cured the states of this sickness.

Due process protections up to now in the family courts have been limited. That does not mean that you have to accept that or that you have to roll over and give in to every attack they make on your and your child. That doesn't mean that you are a horrible person, or have something to hide, or that you do not care about what is best for your child if you disagree with them. They want you to feel that way and they certainly want you to believe that.

It can be quite a nightmare for a parent first going through a child custody battle in the divorce courts. You are told that if you don't give in you will be suspected of covering something up. But you are not required to let them in to your business now are you? And if you don't let them in they threaten you with the most precious person in your life, your child. Boy doesn't that really piss off a narcissist or the other parent who feels injured by you when you care about your child still but want to get away from them!

So the court uses this anger and vindictiveness of one parent and the frustrations of both to fuel their practices of ignoring proper due process.

"Due process protections are further limited by allowing the custody action to be taken under the veil of a civil action between two competing parties, when this type of action should only take place in a quasi-criminal civil action that is clearly between an individual and the State as prosecutor of State Interests. By acting under the guise of a divorce proceeding, the State masks the nature of the proceeding in a manner that fundamentally deprives the accused of appropriate Due Process protections."

If the state did not have a state interest then they would have no grounds to act. If they state that the "best interest of the child" is what makes it a state interest, you can challenge that with the arguments in our book, "NOT in the Child's Best Interest."

But why would you want to do this you might ask when you can just prove that you have nothing to hide and have done nothing wrong? Ask the hundreds of thousands of parents who have gone through divorce with children and you will quickly see a pattern of futility in this exercise. We have known so many parents who "went along to get along" only to find out that even after they proved they were free of any skeletons in the closet and a perfect parent, still were told that the other parent would be the chosen one!

There is really only two ways to prevent this, the other parent agrees with you and you present an order to the court that protects your rights and time with your child, or you protect your rights when the other side and the court want to infringe on these rights. Keep in mind that in no way should anyone be requiring you to forfeit and give up any of your rights regardless of whether you can exercise them at the time or not. See "In re Sanders" for more on how this should be handled.

Walk yourself through all of the arguments that you hear the family courts making and you will find discussion on these in our books or in our webinars and on our blog with case citations to help you counter these things that the courts are using as their guise to continue to abuse you during the process of dissolving your marriage. And if you don't find argument then contact us for help.

The above quoted excerpt is from page 191 of our book called "NOT in the Child's Best Interest" and you can get one for yourself by clicking on the link.

NOT in the Child's Best Interest

By understanding this, you will be able to present a better case to your judge for why your rights do apply in their court and how.


When you attend these webinars you can learn more about how you can get better results by changing how you are approaching situations with the other parent.

You can learn more about how to reason through your rights and protect your rights in our booksand courses. Click at the top on Store and you will find the booksand trainingtabs. The book teaches you your rights and the training courses teach you how to argue them like I demonstrated above.]

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Come back to this blog every day this year and you will find another valuable tool posted to help you protect your family, your hard-earned money, and your ability to continue to pursue your life dreams with your child by your side.

Strategic Parental Rights Strategist, Instructor, Constitutional Scholar, and Author

Divorce Solutions and Child Custody Solutions

Co-author “Not in the Child’s Best Interest” (Book on parental rights and children’s rights)

Co-author “Protecting Parent-Child Bonds: 28th Amendment” (Book includes guide for legislators)