Many parents and organizations fighting against family court injustices wonder why more people aren’t more sympathetic and aren’t fighting back or stepping up to stop the family court injustices.
According to the RAND corporation study “Rebellion and Authority” findings, the answer to this might be shocking – the cost is not high enough. The determining factor as to whether or not others will respond and act in a way that stands up to abuse of power is determined by the costs versus benefits calculation, and if the cost is not high enough, you won’t rebel. “If you were in a position of power, you didn’t have to worry about how lawbreakers felt about what you were doing” (Gladwell, “David and Goliath, 2013 p202).
I know you know and we know that most parents are not “lawbreakers” but that this is how judges treat the parents. The point here though is that parents will look at this and think “but what could be much higher than the loss of your relationship with your child, right? Judges know they don’t have to worry about how you “feel” about what they are doing because they know how these “costs versus benefits calculation” works when you are under emotional pressure. So while you are thinking what could be much higher cost than losing your child, and surely parents will fight back. You are not aware of the tricky part about the risks/costs versus benefits in child custody situations and how parents perceive these. And what role your emotions play? Are your emotions putting blinders on your calculations?
The RAND report believed that “Consequently, influencing popular behavior requires neither sympathy nor mysticism, but rather a better understanding of what costs and benefits the individual or the group is concerned with.” (Gladwell 2013 RAND p. 201). While some of this is true and plays a large role, there is also so much more to it. Gladwell uncovers some of this and we and our other expert speakers uncover the rest. This and much more will be discussed at our speaking events. You can register today for Breaking Thru Family Court Barriers with Ron and Sherry Palmer here. (Apparently Meetup has lost our group so this link is not taking you to our group. Please send us a message through the services page if you want to be notified when the group link is fixed.)