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I Didn’t know how long it would be before I would see my children again each time I had to say good bye to them at the airport to send them back to their father. My attorney wasn’t helping and in fact my attorney didn’t prevent this either. So I set out on a mission to find out how to fix this and get my children back. What I found out along the way was shocking. I had rights my attorneys never told me about.
I needed help handling my case pro se and the results I got after getting this help and support from non attorneys was far better than when I had an attorney. It was scary and difficult but my children were important to me and my love for them allowed me to push through along with help from my best friend and number one support. Ron B Palmer’s support and help organizing the hundreds of e-mails bullying and degrading me, kept me focused and strong to face the courts time and time again. It helped me stay strong and stand up to the judge because I had someone to help me with this. The BAR association doesn’t want you to have this help and they don’t require attorneys to know how to protect your rights that would prevent this stress, trauma, and uncertainty.
Now that Ron and I have materials that parents and attorneys can actually use to start understanding your rights and how these rights should be applied in the family courts and how they should be used, the attorney BAR association doesn’t want you to have this information. They prefer that we shut up and go away, so that you will shut up and go away. By providing you this information they are having a more difficult time cheating you, lying to you, and stealing your children from you. They are having to answer about their practices. They are being challenged in more effective ways. And it is scaring them.
If it hadn’t been for people teaching me that there was a name for what my children were going through, teaching me about parental alienation. If it hadn’t been for Catherine MacWillie, Jill Egizii, Linda Gottlieb, Amy Baker, Attorney Brian Ludmer, Wendy Perry, Joanie Kloth-Zanard, Dr. Bone, and Dr. Warshak books and discussions, and Dr. Childress’ blog, I wouldn’t have known what to call it and would not have been able to understand how to address the reactions and responses that I was getting from my children. I would have been less effective. I am grateful for all of them sharing information and education.
I am very thankful for the support that I received from The Father’s Rights Movement and Thomas Fidler.
But what I really needed after I got the information was an attorney who would make the arguments for me and who would be willing to protect mine and my children’s rights. That I couldn’t find. And by the time I figured out what I needed to do and what I needed I was too broke to be able to afford an attorney. Instead I had attorneys telling me to sell something and replenish their retainer. Instead I had to wait until Thursday to see my child after school because I couldn’t go to their school and have lunch with them anymore. They had been switched to different schools and those schools were very unfriendly to noncustodial parents. I would have had to continue to endure the endless Thursdays waiting and wondering if my child would be there or if they were shuttled out a back door because they didn’t want to come that time. I would have had to endure the constant humiliation and disappointment of showing up to the exchange for my children only to have their father drive up and then decide he didn’t want to turn them over to me that visit and drive off again. It was a constant emotional roller coaster never knowing what assault that I would have to endure next and who would contribute to the next one, his team of attorneys (at one point he had three attorneys), which child he would recruit for the next one, and which former family friend would secretly inform him of my whereabouts and what I was doing, or what parenting decision would be used against me next to bring the power of the state on me through the court again.
If I hadn’t had the support and friendship of Ron B Palmer and him there to organize my case for me when I was too emotional to do it, I truly would have had a much harder struggle. I had police attacking me, attorneys telling me that I was a horrible mother if the children were not siding with me, I had my ex trying to force counselors on me who would try to minimize what was happening, and I had a judge telling me to hire an attorney after I ran out of money and couldn’t even pay the last attorney.
No, if I had not found my own information and support system, if I had relied on the BAR approved attorneys, I would not have gotten my children back in my life. In fact, I wouldn’t have been able to continue to fight. That is the point for the BAR though isn’t it, to have most of these fights end no matter the injustice you suffered, but just to end so that they can do it to the next person and the next and never be challenged. They can protect the judge’s abuse of power, make a lot of money for themselves, and they can continue to refuse to provide parents and children with constitutional protections without any worry of being challenged.
Thank you to all of you who do this work and provided me with the support, information, and education that helped me find my way. This experience set me on this mission to make sure that parents get the education and information that I was not given.
The BAR has failed to provide licensed attorneys who protect parental rights in domestic relations cases involving child custody between two disputing natural parents. So we provide you with that information so that one day parents aren’t having to spend their entire life savings and then some fighting for rights that they shouldn’t have to fight over, and end the fear that a split from the other parent means losing your child too.
It is time for the legal field to grow up. It is your children and your rights, you should have as much information as you want, you should be allowed to learn from those who wish to educate you, you should be allowed to decide what works for you and what doesn’t. The foundation of this country is our rights, without them we never would have been free of the king. And without your rights you will never be free of the legal abuse wielded by the attorneys practicing family law. Without your rights you cannot challenge your ex, you could not object to any decisions being made by a judge. And without knowing your rights, you cannot protect your time and authority to your child, you cannot protect your child to be with you equally to the other parent, you cannot fight to provide for and raise your child as you see fit, you cannot decide what is best for your child despite a judge thinking they know what is better.
Without activists you would not even know that this was happening, you wouldn’t be reading this now, you would only have what your attorney wanted you to know.
Ask yourself how much have you had to spend and what has your attorney told you and done for you regarding your parental rights? Has your attorney told you how to go to court without spending tens of thousands of dollars on discovery, dragging your friends, neighbors, and family into your dispute, and how to restrict the litigation to just adjudication of the rights? Has your attorney even talked to you about caselaw that says that these rights are fundamental and what it means to have a fundamental right and proposed any ways to protect those rights and to challenge the attack on those rights?
Or has your attorney said that this would make you look like you were going to lose and to just appease the judge, and that the judge can do whatever the judge wants to do. Did you know to question this and did you know how to question this?
There is so much that parents are not being told and attorneys have gotten too lazy to care to do it any other way. Attorneys have gotten used to family law being the easiest and most lucrative way to make money for doing nothing. They are not practicing law they are running a scam. It doesn’t require law to go in to a court and sling mud at each other. Where there are no crimes, and nothing illegal, there is nothing to litigate. But attorneys will tell you otherwise won’t they.
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